"Friendship is unnecessary, like philosophy, like art... It has no survival value; rather is one of those things that give value to survival." - C. S. Lewis


this is a copy of an email that my best friend sent me yesterday that really moved me to recognize that along with the challenges that the Lord sends us, He also sends us the people and things that we need to be able to survive and come out on top. you can never anticipate the changes that the Lord has in store for someone's life - but my friend's life is proof that when it comes to surviving life and all of its ups and downs, only the true, sacrificial, life-giving love given to us from the cross is capable of helping us all to overcome our own weaknesses and, in turn, enables us to open our arms to another person to offer him that same merciful generosity.



"Hey,Thank you so much for calling me! I will most deffinitely make a point to watch the show, I might even have Julie tape it.

Last year I thought a lot about what I would do in the future about telling people about my eating disorder. I knew that last year was not the appropriate time because it was not under enough control yet. But I always imagined myself speaking on the subjects to women througout the country. I would at least like to give my testamony to my fellow students here but can't imagine that going over well. You are right about people just simply not understanding. I really think that you have to have walked it to know what it is like. But I also think that people should not have to hide it or be left in the dark about the true facts of eating disorders. I think that the bravery that it takes to tell someone that you do struggle with it is one of the biggest steps to recovery. One of the biggest struggles that keeps people in their eating disorders sometime for years and years, is the shame that comes along with it. All the women that I know with eating disorders are unbearably ashamed of themselves and of their disorder. I have been so blessed in the last few years to have gained so much confidence in myself that I am not ashamed anymore because I know to a certain extent that the shame itself is feeding my eating disorder.

People talk about alcoholism all the time and eating disorders are always hush hush. I think that at first it would be increadably difficult to tell your story just because there is so little information out there for the public. Opinions have already been established and peoples criticisms come to the surface easily, but I think it is out of ignorance.If they knew what it was really like, what really goes on in the minds of the people with the disorder they would want the whole world to know. In some sense eating disorders are a private matter but in many ways the information about them NEEDS to be adamently thrust upon the public ears and eyes! They need to know the signs and symptoms and how to deal. The women who struggle need to know that there is help and they are not alone.

1 in 3 teenage women struggle from eating disorders. Most women who have struggled once will continue in their symptoms for the rest of their lives. Even guys have eating disorders. In fact it is not entirely uncommon for most guys to struggle at some point with body image and controling their food intake. most do it because of sports and not because of the reasons that women do it...but they still do it. Even my dad told me that when he was a senior in highschool and a wrestler, his coach wanted him to wrestle at the weight class he was not in so he had one fresca a day at lunch for something like 4 weeks, until he made it to the weight class his coach wanted him in. By the end of the 4 weeks he could barely even wrestle. This happens all the time in highschool and college.

People don't understand and trust me it SUCKS... I have struggled with Julie for over a year now just because she doesn't understand. But that doesn't mean that they shouldn't know. In fact I think that it means even more just how much people need to be told. They need to be informed. They need to know what to do and when to do it. You were great Kelly. I don't know what I would have done if you had not done for me what you did. But (as you well know...) there are far too few Kelly Carlsons in the world. Most people just stand by and watch their friends kill themselves. Most people don't know what to do because they themselves have similar problems. Most people who are willing to take action don't do it soon enough and aren't willing to wait it out through all of the hell that takes place. Most people are not willing to sacrifice what you were to help the people that they love.It frustrates me when husbands play the role that, "Well I love my wife so I want her to do whatever makes her happy, even if that is killing herself." When does the cost of our desire for autonomy catch up with us? When does our desire for what we think we want and need get to be to much? When it effects our children? When it effects our husbands? When we have lost so much weight? When we are on the verge of death? When does what we want go beyond reason? When does what we want need to be overruled with what is actually good for us? When does someone step in? These are all things that few are willing to address. And more need to! Eventually I want to... someday! Maybe I will write a book like Katie Gesto. Maybe someday i will tell my story. I just hope by that time it is not too late. That the public opinion isn't so far gone that there is no redeeming peoples thoughts on eating disorders. I want other women who struggle with it to know that there is hope and healing and love for them. Everyone needs to know that right.

WHOA... so this is very long and whew I just get so excited and worked up! I crack myself up!! Hope you enjoyed my rant! Hopefully it gives you somewhat of an insight into what I think!

Hurray for best friends! Thank you for everything that you have done for me and the love that you have shown me! By showing me that I am lovable, by showing me the love of Christ, you helped save my life!Now it is my turn!!

have a great day Kel!
I love you!"
http://medlineplus.gov/
http://www.nationaleatingdisorders.orghttp://
www.nimh.nih.gov/